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2003-01-15 ~ 10:47 p.m.
Listening to: Listening to: Kazaa is STILL A bitch. Once when I was in elementary school the librarian read us this really famous book called Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No-Good, Very Bad Day. I've modified that title and translated it into Melissa language. I subject to you: Melissa and the Enormously, Riduculously, Mind-Bogglingly Bad Day (or, My Life Makes A Day in the Life of a Prison Inmate Look Good) Once upon a time there was a little girl named Melissa. And the one thing that Little Melissa hated more than anything, was school. Every day she had to wake up at 6:00 in the morning, splash cold water onto her face, stumble out onto a curb, and be driven to a large brown rectangular building by a large yellow rectangle. One day, Melissa woke up on the wrong side of the bed. No seriously. Upside down. When she splashed cold water on her face, she felt that her skin was getting all bumpy. "Shit," Melissa said, "I just sprouted like eight zits overnight." But Melissa decided that just because she had tiny bacterial infections all over her face, didn't mean it would be a bad day. Then Melissa turned on her radio and listened to the weather report. "Shit," she said, "It's like 13 degrees outside." But Melissa decided that just because she was going to have to walk a block in the freezing cold, didn't mean it would be a bad day. When Melissa went downstairs, her Daddy was already there. "Oh goody," thought Melissa, "Daddy will surely drive me to school and I won't have to ride in the awful yellow rectangle!" But alas, Melissa's Daddy refused to save his daughter from becoming a Melissa-sicle, and forced her to walk out to the curb because it "Built character." When Melissa got to school she remembered that she had a rather important test that day, in Drivers Education, (or Driver's Ed for short), and that she had not studied at all. "Well shit," Melissa said. "I'm going to fail and never get my permit," even though it was simply the practice test. But still, she decided that even though she was about to take a test that she didn't know any of the answers to, didn't mean it would be a bad day. But as the day moved along, lots and lots of bad things happened to Melissa. First, in band class, they got a new song and she discovered that she sucks at everything. And then, in Biology class, she got a 77% on a major exam. And then, in lunch, she lost her beloved pencil-pencil case ("SHIT!!!!!"). And then, in History, someone had thrown up in the back of the room and she went through the entire period feeling like she was about to toss her ham sandwich. And then, in Driver's Ed, after the (extremely-easy-I-don't-know-why-I-stressed-so-much) test, she rested her forehead on the sleeve of her knitted duster and succeeded in created dozens of little line-shaped indentations on her forehead, and then walked around the whole rest of the day like that. And then, she got another 77% on a major Geometry exam. And then, she went to Lab Band, and she got a new song and realized that she sucked at everything. By now, Melissa was beginning to think to herself, "Shit. This is a bad day! In fact, right now, my life makes a day in the life of a prison inmate look good." THE END. The moral of the story kids? Zits + Subzero temperatures + Bad Grades = ::hisses::
Falling Upward ~ Falling Downward
Miss Anything? i'm portable - 2005-02-16 busy making big mistakes - 2004-06-12 i'm sorry I know that's a strange way to tell you - 2004-03-21 hello darkness - 2004-03-17 another night slips away - 2004-03-15
All words � MM 2001-03 |
>Who<
>Fun<
>Design<
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