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2003-03-13 ~ 11:35 p.m.
Listening to: Listening to: WE ARE STRONG! No one can tell us we're wroooong! Search-ing our hearts for so loo-ooong...both of us knowing...love is a battlefield... Happy happy happy happy. Things are starting to look up a little! Amazing what a single day can do for my sanity! Today has been really weird. some moments I was pretty happy to be existing, and then other moments, particularly at about 5:30 this afternoon (I don't really feel like relaying the details...let's just say that Melissa no longer feels attraction to anything about SHM besides his hands), I was feeling pretty crappy. So before 6:00, I was ready to write this day off as another crap day. Then I went to piano. First of all, Miss Bing got her own place and it's fabbity fab fab, in the words of Georgia Nicholson. Since she doesn't live there, she said she will let me take my friends over to the apartment on Saturdays and hang out as long as we don't totally trash it. Which we won't, of course. Also the new setting of lessons just makes everything feel more personal. I'm not interrupting her home life by being there or anything--and there are no awkward moments between her family and the students anymore. Also the acoustics in the piano room are really really great. I sound much better on a carpeted floor than on hardwood, hee hee. I know you all care. But getting down to the good stuff. Mike. (Previously referred to as "Hottest Guy Ever" and "Sex God) I am seeing a lot of hope for us becoming better friends. I don't know why but it's easy to talk to him. I don't feel like our conversations are forced. Also he smiles at me a lot, which is a good sign. I think Miss Bing was trying to drop hints that he is interested too, but I can't say for sure. All I know is...even if this is just all in my head, I sure needed it today after the ordeal I had online with SHM...Basically I lost all respect for him and I kinda snapped myself back to reality. I can't force something that isn't there to begin with. We have completely different interests and the more I learn about him the less I like him. This doesn't mean I'll be nasty to him, I just had a very harsh reality check but I'm glad I had it at the right moment. Yup yup. Oh lala. Life is dandy. For once I think I've got things figured out a little bit. Granted, I don't expect to be as cheery in a couple days, when I am suffering from Mike withdrawal and I have numerous homework assignments to be turned in. But for now I think I'm pretty happy. Yup. Pretttty happy indeed. Goodnight, D-land.
Falling Upward ~ Falling Downward
Miss Anything? i'm portable - 2005-02-16 busy making big mistakes - 2004-06-12 i'm sorry I know that's a strange way to tell you - 2004-03-21 hello darkness - 2004-03-17 another night slips away - 2004-03-15
All words � MM 2001-03 |
>Who<
>Fun<
>Design<
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